According to me, Genevieve; because every wedding planning blog needs a ‘you’re engaged, now what?’ post.
1. Open a new email account that will be dedicated to wedding planning.
Do you really want to give your personal email away to every potential vendor and wedding website you sign up for? To be honest, I did not create a new email but I really wish I had.
In this new email account you can setup folders like venue, caterer, photographer, videographer, DJ, ideas,… This will help you stay organized, which will help you keep your sanity when things start to get crazy. You could even set your name to Future Mrs or Miss Nearlywed so you have some privacy.
2. With your new email address, signup for every wedding related website, newsletter, and forum.
Since it isn’t your personal email address, why not give it away like a prom queen? All of the “junk mail” could actually really help you. Lots of websites will provide you with countdown emails, which can be pretty exciting. Tons of websites will send you checklist updates to keep you on track. Other websites will send out emails with gorgeous inspiration photos. The Broke-Ass Bride sends out a newsletter with great steals and deals. You can also get planning articles, giveaways, and all kinds of other wedding material sent straight to your inbox.
Forums are great for asking questions, discovering ideas, getting feedback on ideas and projects, venting, and just general chit chat with people who are also wedding planning. Remember, not everyone in your real life wants to hear about your wedding all of the time.
Tip: Check out my planning resources tab for wedding websites.
3. Brainstorm what type of wedding you really want.
Before you can decide on a date and vendors, you should decide what kind of wedding you want. Do you want a casual, laid-back wedding; or a glamorous over-the-top wedding; or a simply elegant, formal wedding? Do you want a big wedding or a small wedding; an outdoor wedding; an evening wedding? Do you want a spring, summer, fall, or winter wedding? Do you want a huge bridal party or just your one sibling? Do you want children to attend? These are all important things to think about before you get deeper into planning.
It might help to think of all of the weddings you’ve attended. What was your favorite part? Do you want to incorporate something similar into your wedding? What was your least favorite part? Do you want to eliminate those things from your wedding? For example, I’m not huge fan of cocktail hours or having to find the ceremony site, then having to find the reception site. So I had my ceremony and reception in the same place and went straight from the ceremony to dinner.
4. Nail down a theme.
After you have been bombarded with wedding inspiration in your wedding email inbox, start narrowing down a theme. Even if you don’t want a “theme” wedding, you need a theme to tie everything together. It can be a color theme or something more abstract like a romantic theme. Either way, you will need something so that everything flows. This will also help you make all kinds of decisions from your venue to your invites. Just make sure that your theme fits in with the kind of wedding you want to have. For example, if you have a traditional themed wedding, you should probably have traditional music.
Tip: Check out my at a glance tab and make your own wedding at a glance.
5. Decide on a Budget.
Figure out how much money you could spend on your wedding, your max budget. Then decide how much you actually want to spend. Maybe you could spend $10K, but you would rather use $5K for the wedding and $5K for a new car or down payment on a house.
Tip: Check out my budget breakdown tab.
6. Prioritize the big ticket expenses.
Rank the following items from 1-10, 1 being the most important:
___ Venue
___ Bridal Attire and Accessories
___ Cake
___ Entertainment (DJ or Band)
___ Centerpieces
___ Stationary (invites, programs, etc.)
___ Food
___ Flowers
___ Photographer
___ Videographer
Now that you know what is most important to you and your groom, think about skimping on the bottom five so that you can splurge on the top five items so that you can get everything you really want within your budget. If you don’t prioritize wedding expenses you may end up having to up your budget. We all know how to splurge, so here are a few quick ideas on how to skimp on these items:
Venue – Ask around to see if anyone is a member somewhere with a free banquet room.
Bridal Attire and Accessories – Look for a sample or used gown and borrow or DIY accessories.
Cake – See if you know anyone who will make wedding dessert, it doesn’t have to be a cake, as a wedding gift to you and your groom. Or consider having sheet cake instead of tier cake, it will save a small fortune.
Entertainment (DJ or Band) – See if you know anyone who will provide ceremony music as a gift to you and your groom or for a small fee. Does one of your friends, siblings, aunts, uncles, or cousins play an instrument? Ask around to see if anyone you know has DJ equipment or has access to really cheap rentals. See if you can have someone MC an IPod reception.
Centerpieces – Have non-floral centerpieces. Use free or borrowed items.
Stationary (invites, programs, etc.) - Purchase print-your-own invite kits when they are 75% off, when new styles are coming in.
Food – Consider having a reception during a non-meal time so that you can just have some snacks and dessert.
Flowers – Make DIY artificial bouquets.
Photographer – Find a hobby photographer or friend looking to build their portfolio.
Videographer – Have a family friend videotape the wedding. Everyone knows someone with a video camera now-a-days.
Tip: Check out my steal vs. splurge tab.
7. Decide on a rough guest list before you look at venues.
Wedding venues have an ideal number of guests. You don’t want to look at venues that won’t fit all of your guests, but you don’t want a huge venue that will look empty either.
8. Book the most important vendor and set the date in stone.
If you have your heart set on a certain vendor, don’t set your date in stone until you have that vendor booked on that date. If you have your heart set on a specific date, know that some vendors will not be available that day so you might not get your top choice in venues, DJs, photographers, etc.
9. Ask your bridal party.
If you Google ‘how to ask bridal party’ or ‘will you be my bridesmaid’ you will get a million creative and cute ways to ask your bridal party to be in your wedding. While these are great and can make your bridal party feel special, don’t forget that you can always pick up the phone, call them, and ask the old fashion way. Or you could even just ask them the next time you see them. If you don’t have a lot of time, it doesn’t have to be fancy. The important part is to give them plenty of notice.
Also, remember to give them as many detail as possible when you ask them. Tell them what days you need them, what they will be expected to pay for, etc. They have lives too and need to save to buy bridesmaids dress, hair, and whatever else they will be responsible for. They work and will need to make sure they have the wedding day off.
10. Tell everyone!
Since your wedding is probably over a year away, make sure nobody else gets engaged and picks the same date that you’ve picked. You can send out save the dates or just spread the date via word of mouth.
